Sober as a Judge

On Friday I left the house for a few hours and had a much needed lunch with my friends Terri and Sam. It was Terri's birthday and she went somewhere that was quiet and easy for me to get to so I attempted my first train journey on my own which was successful. As it's so cold I had to wrap up warm with a faux fur jacket but underneath I wore a jacket from H&M (£30) with a stripy top from New Look (around £14, would help if I could find the label or receipt!) and black jeggings from Uniqlo which are so comfortable. (£15) My buckled boots are old ones from New Look. I went for a bold lip using Rimmel Apocalips in Stellar

I was only out for about 3 hours and watched my friends enjoy alcohol thinking I wish I could have just one drink! My anti seizure medication does make me feel a bit out of it at times so it's like I'm drunk anyway! I went back to my boyfriend's house at 4.30 and was shattered so had to cancel the plans I had for the evening as I couldn't face the journey into the city on a busy Friday evening. (large crowds make me stressed and panicky which makes my head feel worse and could trigger a seizure) I need to learn to only agree to one event in one day over the next few months. It's so frustrating though as I used to be here, there and everywhere so I feel so drained and trapped. I've been feeling really down and sorry for myself but I'm trying to snap out of it as this situation should only be temporary